Innocent jokes by Kids

This happened to my brother's neighbour. Neighbour a lady was trying to feed her 4 yr old kid some rice dish. Kid was refusing to have it.
Neighbour wanted to coerce her Kid and mentioned, "Dont you remember what the Doctor had asked you, 'Didnt he ask you to eat well?' ".
Kid had an innocent question, "Did the doc ask me to have the food even when it doesn't taste good?"


Buy an ATM...
My cousin's kid had accompanied him to ATMs quite often.
When the kid had asked for a ship toy, cousin had replied
"Dad does not have enough money this month, lets buy it after next
month's salary."
Kid had immediately replied, "Why dont you buy an ATM machine dad,
we can take money whenever we need it..."

It will go for a toss...

There was a technical discussion when AM mentioned that making these changes to the framework will cause the system unstable and it will go for a toss.
My question was "Should we expect a head or tail...kind of result"

Small entry

GN was mentioning about configuration changes to get validation framework to work. He said " 'small' entries have to be made to this config file".
I had a genuine doubt "Should we have to reduce the font size and make these entries?"

Heights of sleeping...

Last saturday morning around 9 AM my roommates came after a game of Tennis and found me sleeping on my bed still...

My roommate said "Heights of sleeping!!!"

'Sleep'ishly I replied "2 & 1/2 feet."

Horoscope has become 'horror'scope

As we are doing bridegroom search for my sister, am having a tough time with horoscope matching experience. In a fit of frustration mentioned to my cousin that horoscope is like 'horror'scope with even the nicest prospects.

She replied,
"I used to believe in future forecast but now I don’t even believe in weather forecast!"

How much I Wish, I could just change my Dad's perception on horoscope matching.

Throw your views...

Pk: r u free...I want to talk with u 4 sometime. [At present I have no knowledge of Actuate Report Server, which this Guy Manohar knows]

Manohar: We are discussing abt an Actuate's problem. Why don't u throw ur Views?

Pk: What abt Tables, Procedures and Functions?

Just copied my old jokes here and here's todays

After having palak chicken(chicken delicacy with spinach) my friend was not happy with the taste. He mentioned "The Chicken was missing something..."


Pk: The Chicken did not have life.

We love vegetarians...

A hotel chain in London is famous for its Chickens...and to satisfy vegetarians they had a small section of burgers in their menu above which was written.

We love vegetarians...all our chickens are vegetarians.

How mobiles let everyone be fooled about location

During a chat my friend was saying how a fellow passenger in his train was ballantly bluffing that he had reached Faridabad/Gaziabad when they were still some 10-15 minutes away from that place.

Surprisingly we were discussing the same topic(how mobiles let everyone be fooled about location) when I was returning back to Delhi in train. In one incident, the other person had bluffed that he was coming to a planned destination and he is already in his car. The person who was chatting immediately had asked him to "Blow horn and show!". Obviously couldn't escape this simple test.

So next time your friend is informing you that he is well on the way as planned try to get some simple proof like this.

Thank God! Breathing is involuntary

My friend was frustrated by a young dumb co-worker
who messed up some setup and that led to many problems.
Totally pissed off, my friend commented,

"That fellow has to constantly 'Thank God for Breathing is automatic'(involuntary),
else he wouldn't have managed to live so long"